The eternal moment

I have been thinking about a lot about Aging lately. I am only turning 25 this June and yet a feeling of bizarre weirdness surrounding me. "I am 25, now what?" Time seemed to be having a conspiracy against me, not revealing anything to do with my future. Yes, I am still busy with all that is happening in my reality, yet there is the silent me that is growing within me. The one that catches the lapse of time, the same time that my consciousness had failed to see.

To put it simply, I am aging. A process not solely a physical change but also mentally. To many I may still look and behave the same but, something else is going on inside of me, my mind,my soul. Lately I have been meeting some of my friends and conversations with them have somewhat left me confused and yet, amazed and satisfied in a unexplainable manner.

Take for instance, last weekend I met up with my friends who traveled with me to Sikkim. It was a catch up session for us and to do a mass reflection on how we felt after returning 5 months from the trip. Everyone shared. However, what my team leader Siva shared had an impact on me. He chose to live a simple life. He had sold his car and now cycles to work. He is planning to go for mountaineering course during the month of October till September. He does his part to save water. At first I thought, "What a crazy chap! So young and still wants to live a simple life?" I always assumed that people like my leader Siva would conquer more in terms of material asserts as he grows older but I was clearly wrong. I thought it was absurd consciously but something else in me was giving me an unease feeling. Whatever he had said somewhat haunted me. I then recalled the moments of eternal pleasure I had when I was climbing. Alone in that forest trek. The wind as my blanket, not a sound, just me and me alone walking in the forest. I felt my heart beat in harmony with the movement of mother nature. I felt a huge amount of relieve and excitement that I have never felt. It felt good. The eternal moment.

This thought extended when I went dragon boating on Sunday. I saw how my team mates who were in their forties were rowing with so much passion. The key idea according to my friend Jason who leads the active aging program is, focus. As you age, you become more focus. You know what you want and you tend to enjoy a lot more. That explains how men and women in their sixties are still able to be competitive in that age. I suppose Aging is a beautiful process, it just depends on how you see it.

I am currently reading this article in a magazine about aging gracefully. There is this story of a little girl who was shelling peas with her grandma. Suddenly she asked her grandma what she would do if she knew she was going to die in the next fifteen minutes. The grandma replied, "I would still be shelling peas with you". A powerful message. Living in the present, a beautiful way of eternalizing moments.

I am still thinking about Aging. I somewhat wonder if this thought is a result of my stagnation of time in my life or it is really a product of my fear of aging. I am yet to find out. But one thing is for sure, no matter how old I get, my life would still be as exciting as watching a Korean Soap Opera. Even if it is not, I am sure to screw up something so I have something to look forward to.